Archive for November, 2007

I’m really going to start this back up again

I promise.


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Week Somethingsomethingsomething: No Regrets

No Regrets: Write down all of your failures and regrets in life. Invite others to do the same. Get together to make a giant regret-fueled bonfire. Don’t forget the marshmallows!

Once a week this semester, I’ve met with a really cool group of people to do really cool things. Specifics are not important. Usually we meet at someone’s house, but about two months ago, we decided to switch it up and have a bonfire/picnic. As everyone was signing up to bring food and fixings, I encouraged everyone to make a list of their regrets so that we could burn them. Everyone thought it was a pretty bumpin’ idea.

The timing of our bonfire/regret-burning party was perfect. The weekend before our event, I made some really stupid (sober) decisions and I felt like shit. I felt like I’d lost a great deal of integrity because I’d been “that girl”.

When I got to the bonfire, I poured out my heart on the paper, not just about the weekend before, but about all of the stupid decisions I made in my life. After we’d finished writing, we gathered around the fire and each of us shared one thing we’d written. I talked about my grandmother, who was in the hospital at the time, and how I regretted not spending more time with her when she was well (she actually passed away a few weeks ago).

Then, we all threw our regrets into the fire and roasted marshmallows. Yay!

This was an incredibly cathartic experience and, even better, it was a bonding opportunity as well. All of us in the group got a chance to open up to each other and establish trust. I feel that it was a turning point in our relationship: we went from random people united for a cause to (hopefully) lifelong friends. I’d love to make this a tradition among us. We’ll see.

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Prone to Wander

I started this list because I felt restless.  I wonder if it was due to some unknown void in my life, or because I’ve been working at a coffee shop for 5 months now and I consume ungodly amounts of caffeine.  Perhaps both.

I can’t sleep because my hair smells like weed (I wasn’t smoking, for what it’s worth), my nearly-deaf downstairs neighbor is watching TV at odd hours of the night, as usual, there’s a frat party across the street from my house, I’ve had too much coffee, I’ve got a paper to write, and a muffin to eat.

I miss journaling/blogging.  Haven’t done it in a while, for whatever reason.  I think I should do it more often; perhaps it will help me organize my thoughts.  I think I’ve gone crazy.   In all of my conversations, I sound erratic, irrational, and spastic.  My thoughts jump from here to there with no rhyme or reason, and through it all, I find myself thinking, “What the hell am I saying?”, as I’m sure whoever I’m interacting with is thinking too.

Oh, there are so many things going on in my head right now.   I think the only way to organize them is to make a list.  I love lists, by the way.   They are God’s gift to the addle-brained people of the world, like myself.

Things I Realized Tonight:

– I do not like Latin dancing.
– I like to dance, but not with people
– I can only flirt with people that I’m not really attracted to.  If I find myself in a situation with someone that I like, I get a sudden attack of The Dumb and generally end up behaving in a not-so-cute manner.
– Working in retail/food service brings out the inner misanthrope in me.
– Alcohol is overrated, but is a necessary evil for some.
– Our culture has an unhealthy admiration for the mullet.
– I’ve had more than my fair share of cockblocks.
– Telling my (white) friend that sociology class makes me hate white people was probably a misguided decision.
– Pragmatism is refreshingly sexy.

That’s all I’ve got, mios.  I’ll start the list up again soon, but for now I’m using this blog as a landfill for all the random goop in my head.

The end.

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